Have you ever wondered why some people are able to have success in dating and relationships, while others struggle and wonder if love will ever come their way? The answer could be found in understanding Love Rules.

The three most important Love Rules to remember are: Stop, Look, and Listen.

Stop.

Stop focusing on what you don't have and bring what you do have into view. You have attributes, talents, and abilities unique to you. Think about what they are and showcase them. The same goes for your appearance. Enhance and appreciate your good features, polish up what you have, and let go of any inner critical remarks that pass negative judgment on you.

Look.

Look at what you do to your self esteem when you act like a judgment machine. Nothing good comes from mean criticism. Find your encouraging voice that cheers you on. Whenever you have a win or do something you are proud of, tell yourself, "Yay team! Way to go!" Put that sentiment in your own words and make it your new mantra.

Listen.

Listening is a gift--to ourselves and to others. Men are deeply attracted to women who are gracious listeners; women warm to a man who can hear what they have to say and respond appropriately. Being a good listener starts with hearing your own judgmental voice first and learning to turn the volume down. When you are kinder to yourself, that caring ripples out to others.

Wrap these three rules in a blanket of a positive attitude. Negativity repels love; a positive attitude attracts who and what you want.

If you notice negative judgments curling up in your mind, wanting and waiting to spring forth, monitor the words and phrases that would give those thoughts a life.

Stop, Look, and Listen. Love Rules.

Tonja Weimer

Tonja Evetts Weimer is a Master Certified singles relationship and life coach, speaker, syndicated columnist and author.

Tonja is a full time professional coach with a practice in Greenville, SC. She helps individuals, especially singles, re-craft their lives and find happiness and success in their career and relationships. Some of Tonja's professional activities include:

==> Syndicated singles relationship columnist, writing SAVVY DATING, a weekly column read by over a million readers in many U.S newspapers. Tonja's column addresses relationship and life issues of interest to all adults, but particularly to the over 110 million singles in the U.S. Tonja has also had articles published in New Woman, Hope, and House Beautiful magazines, and has won 3 Matrix Awards for her writing.

==> Motivational speaker, Tonja has been a keynote presenter at national and international conferences over the last 30 years.

==> Author of materials for educators and parents (7 books, six music albums and 2 videos), which have won 22 awards.

Some Speaking and Media Highlights:

==> Keynote speaker for 2004 Women?s Issues Network Conference, Sumter, SC.

==> Keynote speaker for 2002 Parents as Teachers International Conference, St. Louis, MO.

==> Keynote speaker for 1999 International Conference for Children & Adults with Attention Deficit Disorder.

==> Keynote speaker for 1998 European Education Conference, in Mannheim, Germany.

==> Keynote speaker in 35 U.S. states at educational conferences.

==> Presenter at the International Special Olympics in Notre Dame, at the request of Eunice Kennedy Shriver.

==> Created Space Songs for Children, at the request of NASA (album taken into space by astronauts three times.)

==> Appeared on CNN?s Showbiz Today and many other TV shows.

Educational and Professional Qualifications:

==> National Fellow (U.S. Dept. of Education.) M.A. in Human Development and Education, with an emphasis on creativity.

==> Master Certified Singles Relationship Coach, Relationship Coaching Institute.

==> Personal Life Coach, Graduate, Institute for Life Coach Training.

==> Member, International Coaching Federation